5 Practical Tips for Supporting a New Mom & Dad from a Doula and Mom to 5
HOLDING THE BABY IS NOT “HELPING”. Louder for the family members in the back!
I said what I said. Mama has carried this baby inside her body for 42+/- weeks. A literal piece of her is missing once baby is on the outside. She wants to hold her baby. Period. She wants to hold her baby. If you say you want to come over to help, and what you mean is that you want to come over to hold the baby, everyone is going to be frustrated with you. That may range from just slightly to HIGHLY frustrated and no one wants you to visit again.
Pets that were once the center of the new mom & dad’s life are now, well, not. Offer to play with their dog or take them for a walk if the pet is agreeable to that. Help the parents by loving on their pets and exercising some of their energy out.
Respect boundaries! If you are asked to get a vaccine before visiting, get the vaccine or don’t visit. If you are asked not to kiss baby, then definitely do NOT do that. You have (had) the opportunity to raise your own children anyway you see fit; this is their child and what they say goes. If you do not respect their boundaries, I can assure you there will be a consequence either now or at some point in the future.
Babies make a lot of laundry. Roll up your sleeves and start washing or folding. Who couldn’t use a hand with laundry?
Breastfeeding makes you ravenous and it’s kind of difficult to prep food and cook while holding a baby. Bring mom and dad a meal. If you dont cook, toss a DoorDash gift card in their direction or bring them some freezer food or snacks. Think outside the box. Kind bars, granola, freezer burritos, electrolyte tabs, a fruit tray — you cannot go wrong here.